“Since I Gave Up Hope I Feel a Lot Better”

“Since I Gave Up Hope I Feel a Lot Better”

I heard a comedian say this years ago. I swear it was Emo Phillips, but I can’t confirm it.

In a strange way it makes sense. You hope for so many things, material things; you hope for so many things to happen, outcomes. You live your life divided, with one foot in the future, stealing from you the Now. So, you live without satisfaction, robbed of the present by something that may or may not happen. In the worst case scenario, when it doesn’t happen you are doubly devastated. First, you lose in not getting what you hoped for. Second, you lose in that you wasted time and energy spent in a false hope.

When you give up this hope, life becomes so much easier. No more longing for something that may not happen. No more devastation when it doesn’t. You are free. Anything good that happens; any good thing you receive, is a bonus.

False Hope

Am I saying should you give up all hope? No.

Didn’t get that promotion, that relationship, that object you desire? Without hope, there is no disappointment. Life goes on. There is no picking yourself up off the floor when that thing doesn’t happen. But there is much joy and thankfulness at the unexpected blessing when it does.

Go back and insert the word false before the word hope. The problem is not hope, but the wrong definition of hope. What is hope? It is NOT crossing your fingers. Hope IS an expectation, but hope is NOT an expectation without foundation. If you hope for anything without a promise that it is going to occur, you are engaging in false hope. Likewise, if the promise does not come from someone who can guarantee it, that is a false hope.

Do Not Let Hope Be Tied to Outcomes

What I’m suggesting is that you let go of outcomes. You do not know how things are going to turn out, and usually there is no promise of a certain result. Let what happens happen. I’ve heard many stories of people who have left a church, or the church, because of something that happened. A pastor had an affair, or another member did something hurtful, and the person lost faith. This comes from a false hope of what churches are supposed to be like. It comes from an assumed promise of a certain outcome.

Likewise, who hasn’t heard a story about someone who is mad at God, or has lost faith because they thought God promised them something, and it didn’t happen. Rather than focus on the theological problem here, I want to point out the problem in that false hope. What so often happens is that God says, “Go here,” or “Do this,” and the person hears, “If you go here, or do this, this great thing will happen.” When the great thing doesn’t happen, the person feels that they have been lied to. But He never said anything about what the outcome would be. He just said, “Trust me. Go.”

Divorce yourself of this tendency to be tied to the outcome. Let go of that “hope.” If I could change one thing about those around me it would be to stop trying to force things to go the way you “know” they should go. You don’t know, and even if you did, it’s not your job to make it happen. Do what is in front of you to do and leave it in his hands.

Do you have another choice? Admit that you have no control over the end result. Once you let go of that vague hope that the world around us sells as a valid endeavor, you will feel better. All of the pressure, all of the striving, all of the uncertainty will fade away. You can rest.

This is peace.

Another Kind of Hope

The apostle Paul says, “...suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.…” (Romans 5:3-5). This is clearly not some vague baseless hope that things will turn out the way you want. Our world’s idea of hope is certainly not produced by the ability to suffer in such a way as to build character. This is a different kind of hope that has a solid foundation based in experience, and more importantly, based on a promise from someone who can deliver.

I give you this definition of hope: Hope is the expectation of something that you know will happen. You know it because it is promised by someone who can and will deliver. The best analogy I can think of is the sun coming up, or my paycheck showing up in my checking account. I have through years of experience come to believe that the sun will come up. The same with my paycheck. It’s there every fourth Friday.

Now you might say that is not “hope.” But in the biblical definition of hope, the only thing that makes it hope is that you don’t have it yet. Just like tonight, I don’t have the sun, but I “hope” (expect) that it will come up tomorrow.

Why does this matter? The obvious answer is that I don’t spend all night worrying whether the sun will come up tomorrow. I can sleep tonight. But the more important answer is that it affects how I live today. I live with the expectation that there will be a sun tomorrow. I live as though I will get paid on Friday. I don’t hoard my money until the next check arrives. I spend what I need to.

These seem like obvious banal analogies, but it is even more important spiritually. You need to let go. Don’t worry about tomorrow (outcomes). The promise is “all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose…” (Romans 8:28). Just like trusting that the sun will come up, or any one of the million things we expect to happen, live accordingly, and do something more fruitful with your time. If you really believe that no matter what happens, it will all eventually turn out for good, it changes the way you live your life.

If you really believe what you believe. If you really trust in the One who can be trusted, you will live differently. Let go of all of the hope in outcomes that are unknown..

And you will feel a lot better.