Repentance - It’s not what you think it is

Repentance - It’s not what you think it is

I say, “Repentance means to change your mind,” and you say, “Yes, about sin. Therefore repentance means to stop sinning.” But I say, “No. Repentance is much more than that, much deeper,” and your eyes glaze over because you have already decided you know what it is.

What you have done is to fit the word “repentance” into your already existing paradigm. It is a transformational concept that you have not allowed to transform you. However you phrase it, you have decided that your main reason for being is to be sinless, or sin less, and that is all repentance will ever mean to you: “Knock it off!”

Your repentance leads to a life of trying. What I’m suggesting is that if you really understood what repentance is, you might have a shot at real freedom from sin.

So, again, I say to you simply, repentance means to change your mind.

Let me restate it: Repentance means to transform your mind: “...but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Romans 12:2). This is a broad mandate, but here I want to show you specifically how this relates to human behavior. We still think too much like earthbound humans. We do not see things from a spiritual perspective. We don’t see what is in front of us the same way God does. Some call it a kingdom perspective.

First, it is important to understand that we act out of who we are. Or to put it another way, we act out of what we believe. This is what James is really talking about when he writes, “Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works” (2:18). He means that his faith, his beliefs about the world and the kingdom, lead him to act. You see, if you claim to have a real, actual, relationship with God, you will act in a way that is consistent with that. If you do not act, it proves that you do not have that kind of faith.

The remedy is not to go out and do good deeds. That would be a lie; you’re faking it. The remedy is to find that transformation of your mind that will make you the kind of person who does those deeds. And that is how you overcome sin as well.

If you do things that you know you shouldn’t do, or have been told you shouldn’t do, then somewhere deep down inside, you believe that activity has a value. You are likely trying to try to balance the value of that thing with the value you see in God, and the battle ensues.

Consider that the idea that you can balance these things is false.

If you change your mind about trying to balance, it changes everything. You don’t repent of the sin, per se, you repent of the idea that you can balance that activity with your relationship with God. Once you truly let go of the false idea that you can balance your Self and God, everything changes. You begin to transform your thinking, and then your outcomes follow.

What you have to come to grips with is that no one deliberately does things they think are bad, so whatever you are doing, on some level, you think it is good. You may say gossip is bad, but then why do you talk about people behind their backs? Because it makes you feel superior. So the “good” is the gratification you get from being able to represent yourself as better than the person you are talking about. If you can recognize that you are feeding your ego and that is not “good,” then you transform your idea of gossip from a good thing to a bad thing. You will begin to extinguish the desire to gossip, because you no longer see any value in it.

This is it. Transformation.

This is how you overcome. Any attempt to directly change a behavior, is just symptom relief. Even if you could control the behavior, you haven’t solved the problem in the heart. Let God work on your heart. Then, only allowing God to change your mind will lead to real changes in behavior. I would even argue that if you succeeded in changing the behavior without changing your heart and mind is dangerous, because it leaves you with the disease (sin), without any signs to tell you you have a problem.

You must dig into your heart of hearts to find what the false value is (others have called them idols). What benefit do you think you derive from putting people down, looking at pornography, fighting to get what you want, etc? We can make an endless list of “sins,” but it’s where they come from that matters. What benefit do you think you might derive from that activity? Especially, unconsciously?

Think about the drug addict. He knows the danger, but he does it anyway. Why? One scenario might be to avoid pain. He thinks that facing his demons, perhaps from his past, is scarier than the side effects of the drugs. He gets a high, which he values, but also gets to avoid the pain of confronting his demons. That’s the false belief. The truth is that, while confronting demons is painful, overcoming them leads to peace. If he can transform his thinking to believe that facing his fears is better, then he can proceed. It must begin with a new way of thinking.

I use drugs an example because I think it makes a clear lesson, but this is not about drugs. This is about all of our behaviors that don’t line up. You must find the false belief. You must realize that it is harmful, not valuable. Even if it seems a good things, you must realize that it keeps you from a better thing.

So: You do value something more than or above Him. Figure out what it is. Understand that it is not good, or not as good as the right thing. When the “sinful” thing is not valuable to you, it diminishes. You are allowing Him to transform your mind.

Paul says, “...and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires” (Romans 13:4). What he’s saying is that you must be totally dedicated to Him and His kingdom. You cannot carve out a little space of your own to indulge in from time to time. The only “me” time in the kingdom is that which rejuvenates you to live better for him. Everything must be evaluated by this rule: “Love God with your whole heart, mind, soul, and strength.” If you can’t do it for God, it has to go.

Repent: Let that transform your mind. Peace awaits.

Sin is a condition, not an action

Sin Is a Condition, Not an Action

Previously, I proposed three ways of defining/looking at “sin” that I think are more useful, but I'm going to change the order a little, and hopefully address the second 2.

1. Sin is selfishness, when YOU are your goal, that’s sin.
2. Sin is anything good done in the wrong context, or for the wrong reason. For instance, consider that sex in itself is good, but it all depends on when, where, why and with whom.
3. Sin IS turning away from God; anything you do on your own and not THROUGH him is by definition sin.

I am going to begin with the third principle, that turning away from God IS sin. But this definition is wrapped up in the first one. Sin is selfishness and there are only two ways to be self-centered, or God centered. Therefore, if you are acting selfishly, you ARE turning away from God, and by definition, that is “sin.”

Remember Jesus saying you cannot have two masters (Matthew 6:24); either you are in charge of he is. If anything, in deed or action (yes, even omission) does not begin with him, then it is sin. Again, to reiterate what I think is so important about this is that we must get away from the idea that the sinfulness is located in actions, deeds. It is not. That idea leaves you in charge, making decisions about when you will “serve” your Self and when you will “serve” him.

Are there actions that are necessarily bad? Try to make a list of things people do that are always bad. Can you think of any circumstances in which those actions could be good? I claim that the blame lies, not in the act, but in the origin of the intent.

I’m sure you’ve heard somewhere that the Bible does not say, “Thou shalt not kill” It says, “Thou shalt not murder.” But what is murder, but killing that is wrong? Therefore, it is not a edict against all killing, but only certain kinds of killing. And how do we determine what kinds of killing are wrong? Doesn’t it come down to intent?

You might say that adultery is always wrong, but the same principle applies. The “act” there is sex, and adultery is sex done in a way that is wrong. Sex is not wrong, it depends on how, when, and why you’re doing it. At the heart of adultery is a selfishness that disregards what God wants, and what the adulterer's spouse wants, because what the Self wants is more important.

I could go on, but find me a counterexample. What action is always bad? I encourage you to consider this, if not to disprove me, but because I think there is a value in considering what God really means by the word “sin.”

This I call “Level 2” (because I think we can go even deeper, but more on that later). So, where did I get this idea that the “sin” is in the intent? For this, I turn to Paul, and a passage that often gets us sidetracked. “All things are lawful to me, but all things are not beneficial” (1 Corinthians 6:12 and 10:23). Rather than get caught up in what we can get away with, notice the important principal. Forget about what you can do; what should you do? What will help you toward your goal (the kingdom).

Does this not change the way you look at sin. Put aside your list of rules, your dos and don’ts. Ask yourself what is going to get you to your goals. If your goal is the benefit of “the kingdom,” what “sin” would you commit under this principle? Furthermore, the definition of sin is anything that doesn’t help you to the goal.

1. Is it selfish?
2. Does it benefit Jesus and his plan?

Consider all of the discussions that Paul gives about things like whether or not to eat meat sacrificed to idols. What is his key consideration? Don’t stumble your brother (i.e. 1 Corinthian 8:13). It’s not about what you do, but why. If you could damage another’s relationship with God (the kingdom), but you do it anyway, you’re being selfish.

But let me continue. Level 3:  It’s about the heart.

Jesus. Look at the Matthew 5:21-30. The basic concept is: forget actually killing each other; a scornful heart is murder. Never mind adultery, if you lust, you’ve already crossed the line.

Now let me say that I never want to take away from the real intent of this passage. What Jesus is doing is upping the bar. He is trying to make it clear that the “mark” we are missing is an inner and outer perfection that is unattainable. You see, what the Pharisees had done is dumb down the law to make it tough but manageable. That way, they could claim perfection. (But don’t we all do that?) Jesus was giving a truer definition of the expectations of the law. When one truly understands what is expected, one should instantly realize that they have not only failed, but that it is impossible. Why? So that you will take the remedy: Grace. He doesn’t want you to try harder; he wants you to give up. “Let go. Let God” is not trite; it’s crucial and indispensable.

Now, for our purposes, there is another lesson here: It is about the heart (Level 3). Once you grasp that it begins with why you are doing what you are doing, we can move on. So, first we ask, is it for my benefit or his? Am I seeking first the benefit of “the kingdom,” or my own kingdom? But now Jesus shows us that the actions are characterized by the heart that they come out of. This not different than the previous level, but a deeper understanding.

Think on the text. You know that murder is wrong, but now you can’t even get angry? This is too hard. But look and see: this anger is a condition of the heart. It is a condition, a state of being. It is not an activity that you can just try harder to not do. It is impossible to restrain it. It is the center of who you are. If the heart is bad, you are done. You can’t try harder, do good deeds, or fix it. You can’t do better, because it isn’t something you did. It is so tempting to think about you can restrain your anger, or improve your thought life. But those are counter actions that may have some effect on actions, but that it symptom relief.

You have a condition: a bad heart. The murder, or the scorn, happened because you have a murderous, scornful heart. Even if you can stop thinking angry thoughts, you haven’t solved the problem; the heart is still bad. It is my understanding that an alcoholic who simply stops drinking is what is called a “dry drunk,” and all AA members know that he hasn’t gotten to the root of the problem. He will ultimately fail.

This is where we find ourselves. So what is the answer?

Be transformed (Romans 12:2). But you don’t do that. He does. All of the reasons we have for behaviors that most of us identify as “sinful” stem from that corrupt selfish heart. Until the heart changes, nothing else matters. It is just window dressing, or rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. I also think a “dry sinner” is the worst condition, because it allows you to live a lie that only keeps you from truly changing.

If we preach sin as “bad things that people do,” we keep alive the lie that one can just do better. We interfere with God’s goal of transformation. If you want to preach sin, preach that it is selfishness. Preach that it is anything not done for God, anything done for the wrong reason.

Better yet, preach turning to God, knowing that anyone who turns to God will necessarily turn away from “sin” (Self).

Don’t try to balance your desires (or even “needs”) with the kingdom. Let go of Self and let the healing begin.

If I am missing something, please comment. Even if you agree, I'd love to hear from you. If you have benefitted from this, please share it. And please sign up.

A More Useful Definition of "Sin"

Christians often make me feel like Inigo Montoya. We keep using Bible words in ways that make me want to say, “I do not think it means what you think it means.”

In my mind, this will be the first in a series, but we’ll see. It has been rolling around in my head long enough that I think I need to put it in print. But one step at a time. In a response to a response to my last post, I asked for a definition of “sin.” Since I haven’t gotten it, I figured it is time to get it out there.

I see this as perhaps the biggest problem for believers. How you combat it (or if you even should) depends entirely on what IT is.  I believe a more useful definition of “sin” will revolutionize your world and free you to become what you were intended to be.

I’ll be blunt: Sin IS selfishness.

What I see around me seems to be the least useful definition of sin: “Doing wrong,” “doing bad stuff,” “being naughty.” I would argue that the problem with this definition is that you don’t REALLY know what “bad” is. You think you do, but you are relying on a culturally determined, vaguely defined, normalized sense of right and wrong that is probably a long way away from a truly good.

There is a lot to be said about this, but let me leave it at this: Things are not sinful. Neither is sinfulness is not located in actions. If that’s what you were thinking, that is where your problem begins.

I propose three ways of defining/looking at “sin” that I think are more useful:

1. Sin is selfishness, when YOU are your goal, that’s sin.
2. Sin IS turning away from God; anything you do on your own and not THROUGH him is by definition sin.
3. Sin is anything good done in the wrong context, or for the wrong reason. For instance, consider that sex in itself is good, but it all depends on when, where, why and with whom.

Ultimately, I’d like to argue that these and any other good definition of sin comes back to the same thing: the Self in control.

First, consider this: Is there any “sin” you can think of that isn’t ultimately putting yourself ahead of God and others?

I think this revelation for me started with considering Jesus’s own words that there was only one commandment: Love God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength (and love your neighbor as yourself - more on that later). Even more important is that Jesus goes on to say, “on these hang all the law and the prophets.” This began a thinking on this topic that changed everything for me. What I realized is that he was saying that rather than try to know all of the “law and the prophets,” he was giving us a simple straight forward approach to the question of behavior.

We tend to see behavior as a list of dos and don’ts, and probably an exhaustive list. I remember fearing that I had missed one, or didn’t know, and God would be mad. It always makes me think of the performer with the spinning plates. How many plates can you keep in the spinning air before it all comes crashing down? If this is your approach, it will come crashing down.

Or maybe for you it is Whack-a-Mole. You stand there with your sin mallet, waiting for temptations to pop up so you can knock them back down.

Can you see that Jesus is giving you a completely different approach? A principle. If you take everything you do, how you spend you time, how you treat others, and ask yourself, “Am I doing this out of love for God? Am I treating the needs of those around me as being at least equal to my own? (Paul actually says to put others ahead of you.) Do I care for them the same as myself?” How can anything sinful come from anything that passes that test?

Anything that doesn’t pass that test is sin.

I feel compelled to point out that any other approach is an attempt to maintain control over your own life. The person who wants a list to follow, the person who wants to try to live up to a standard is really trying to negotiate. You are really saying, “If I do this much, then the rest of my life is my own.” You are trying to avoid truly making him God. You are doing what you must do to get the benefit you want (heaven), and no more. In other words, you are acting in your own self-interest. But no matter how much you do for God, if the goal is your own benefit, you are being selfish, and THAT IS SIN.

Understand, then, that the principle is that everything is done out of a love for God. That is the one rule. To me, “love your neighbor as yourself,” is really just the expression of loving God. If you love him, you will love whom he loves. So if he loves your neighbor, you should too. Also, since God doesn’t need anything from you, how can you return his love? By paying it forward: loving others. So it all comes down to the one rule: love God.

Can you see how simple and elegant this is? What sin can you commit out of a love for God?

But wait, there’s more!

This is why the Bible says: “For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” Matthew 16:25.

“...but in humility count others more significant than yourselves” Philippians 2:3.

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship” (Romans 12:1).

“Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor” 1 Corinthians 10:24.

“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice” James 3:16.

And the list goes on. A search on Google shows sites like “100 verses about selfishness,” or “41 Bible verse about selfishness,” and more.

What else can one understand from the first one? Death to self. Eternal life is found in losing one’s self. Not only that but a better life now is found in letting go of self.

Rather than trying to deal with your “sins” - those actions that you think are wrong. The better question is to ask what your goal is. Is it selfish? Is it out of love for God? What are your motives?

Think about who really benefits from your actions. A lot of people do a lot of “good” things for selfish reasons. It is ultimately meant to benefit them in some way. That’s the problem with the people who will say, “Lord, Lord,” but to whom Jesus will say, “I never knew you” (Matthew 7:21-23). That’s the problem with the way the Pharisees prayed (Matthew 6:5). It was really about getting acknowledgement, not about God.

I have found this approach to be life changing.

If you can truly grasp that putting God and others first is the life that he wants for you, then you must believe that in the long run that will be a better life. You will be happier. It is what you were meant to be. It is - believe it or not - a lot less work. No more defending yourself, no more fighting for yourself, no more holding on to hurt, no more offense or revenge.

You don’t have to worry about things not going your way, because you have no “way” for them to go. Your way is his way, and things always ultimately go his way.

Why do you do what you do? Who are you doing it for?

“If you were to die today, where would you go?”

For some reason, that question has always bothered me, and I think I have finally figured out why.

The first time I heard that question, I was not a Christian and I thought it was absurd. I think I thought it was a huge assumption that I would “go” anywhere. I was only a teen, but it seemed necessary to first establish the metaphysical assumptions behind the question. Even now, I find the concept that we “go” somewhere to be a bit problematic.

But now I realize that the problem with it is that it lies at the entrance to the self-centered gospel. It’s all about you. It suggests that the goal is to secure your ultimate destination, as though that is why someone might become a Christian. This plants a little evil seed in your head. “Just say this little prayer and God will have to accept you.” The ultimate goal is to get to heaven. Never mind who’s there; it’s better than the other place.

What I’m suggesting is that these things matter. How you preach the gospel creates a context for the life of the new believer.

I’m arguing that this little question carries with it certain assumptions, like a virus that infects your computer without you even noticing. Do you see that if your only goal is to get somewhere, you will only do what is necessary to get there? That, in and of itself, carries another huge assumption: that you must DO something.

You see, It only stands to reason that if some people go to the good place, and some people go to the bad place, there must be a difference. This gospel has already established the difference is that you said a prayer. YOU did something. Therefore, the logic goes, you probably have to do something to maintain it. This leads us to the assumption of many that your behavior matters in your eternal destination. After all, isn’t it about good people and bad people?

The result is a “believer” who adheres to a new law, a list of things that one must do to prove they are actually a believer. The “Law” of the Old Testament may be gone, but we have a new one, which likely includes Church attendance, saying prayers, maybe some Bible reading, and probably something else that the individual believer decided God would probably like.

You see, this new “believer” thinks that it’s not about a relationship, or a new orientation; it’s about avoiding the bad place. But at the end of the day, his duties to God fulfilled, his life is still his own. He isn’t a new creation; he’s just the same person with a golden ticket.

Along the way of course, he will have to ignore those pesky verse like, “Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will keep it” (Luke 17:33).  “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matthew 22:37).

Or even more important: “And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent” (John 17:3)

These verses, especially the last one, create a completely other understanding of Christianity than worrying about what happens at the end of your life. This IS eternal life. It’s a NOW thing. It’s not something you get at the end of your life, then you just get more of it. The new life starts now.

Not to hold myself up as an example, but I can tell you that when I came forward at a Calvary Chapel 150 years ago, the last things on my mind were heaven and hell. In fact, what would happen to me was not even a concern at that moment. What I finally knew at the moment was truth. He is real, and I could know him, and that changed everything.

From that moment on, there has never been a destination that I felt I needed to get to. In what I call the “Eternal Now,” I am here and He is here, and there is no need for anything else.

But the implications of this are staggering. If you actually believe that you are somehow connected to the ultimate power in the Universe, all-knowing, all-present, all-powerful, all-loving, you can never ask, “What must I do to be saved?” There is nothing you can do. But you know that, because you know it has already been done. You don’t ask what is required to stay there, because you know that it is out of your hands, and in much better hands.

You wouldn’t dare insult him by doing the bare minimum: “How many times must a I forgive my brother?” It reminds of the old line from the military, “When I say, ‘Jump,’ you say, ‘How high?’” except, in this case, you don’t even ask, you just jump as high as you can.

If the immediate response to a meeting with God isn’t to give your life to him, something is wrong. I don’t mean to oversimplify; it’s a lifelong process. But you can’t come to him for what you can get out of it. That’s not really coming to him at all. That’s making a deal. There are no deals to be made; there is only unconditional surrender.

Finally, how you say things matter. I suppose there is a temptation to get people in the door anyway you can, but if they enter under false pretences, there are very real dangers of misunderstanding what this is really all about. Let’s not bait and switch. Let the truth stand.

Also, if the original question still seems to make perfect sense to you, is it possible that you are laboring under the same false assumptions?

Does preaching sin really fit in the gospel?

I would like you to consider that making sin the centerpiece of the gospel is not biblical. It is not necessary, it is counterproductive, and it is potentially harmful.

I don’t expect you to take my word for it, but how about Jesus? Here is what he said. Everyone is familiar with John 3:16, “For God so love the world that He gave his only son that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” But what about verses 17 and 18?

“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.

There are two key things I would like to point your attention to in these verses. First, he did not come into the world to condemn that world. (Sometimes I feel like Christians think they have to pick up the slack. God isn’t condemning enough, so we add that part back in.) But here’s the point. Part of this message is not condemnation. Why? Because the world stands condemned already.

How does this translate into reality? There are two kinds of people in the world: those who don’t really need to be convinced that they are less than they should be, and those who you are never going to be convinced. People may not be willing to admit it, but they know that they are moral failures. Why belabor the point? The person you are trying to convince may not admit this to you (especially if you are lecturing him on his sinfulness), but deep down he knows.

It’s not about sin; it’s about unbelief

But read on; verse 18 says what the real condemnation is. Why is man condemned? Because he hasn’t believed. I would even argue that unbelief is the only real “sin” left. Why not work on that rather than trying to convince them of a condition that is beside the point anyway. Afterall, someone who believes can be accepted though he is far from perfect, but someone who does just about everything right, but does not believe, will be rejected. Focus on the real problem: belief.

Still don’t believe me? Perhaps you would hold up the story of the woman at the well as an example of Christ focusing on someone’s sin. Ok, let’s take a look. First, Jesus opens up his conversation with the woman by making his offer. She is there for water, but he offers her a water, that if she drinks, she will never thirst again. Far from just a clever opening line, it get right to heart of her condition. She has a need that only God can fulfill.

Ah, but you say, he very quickly moves to confront her sin, but does he really? First, the conversation appears to go on for a bit, so he isn’t in a hurry to get to the “sin” part. Yet, there it is: he asks her to bring her husband. This is the closest he gets to addressing her sinfulness. He knows that she has had 5 husbands, and is now living with someone. But there is a huge difference between what he talks about, and why he talks about it. He doesn’t bring it up to make her feel bad, or convince her that she is bad and in need of a saviour. She is very aware the she lacks something in her life; she just doesn’t know what it is.

It’s not about sin; it’s about what you lack

So why ask her husband to come join them, especially when he knows she doesn’t have one? The answer is that it directly relates back to the living water metaphor. What is the well that she keeps going back to and then thirsts again? It is relationships. What she is thirsty for is a love that will completely satisfy her. Her problem is that she thinks she is going to find it in a relationship with a man, but we see how that turned out.

She “thirsts” again because the relationships didn’t satisfy her. She marries again because she assumes that she just married the wrong man. She never questions that a man is the answer. So, she tries it again and again, only to “thirst” again.

Why? Because what she is really missing is a love that only God can give. Of course, her marriages fail. She is expecting them to fill a void that they were never meant to fill; they collapse under the weight of her expectations.

She thirsts again, because in her spirit she knows there is a relationship that will fill that void, she just doesn’t know that “Mr. Right” is Jesus.

And that is his point.

He brings her past into the conversation, because it directly relates to her lack and is the best way to show her that her problem is not bad relationships, but trying to solve a spiritual problem socially. Can you see that he has no intention of condemning her? Can you see that he does not want to berate her, or establish that she has “fallen short of the glory of God.”

No, behavior is not the reason for her lack of a relationship with God, her lack of a relationship with God is the reason for her behavior, her “sin,” if you will. The answer is to fulfill that need and the “sin” will take care of itself. The point is that his conversation with her is not about sin as sin, but a deeper understanding of how she got into her present condition and the way out.

Can you speak with that level of discernment? My argument is that you can achieve your goal, as Jesus did, without the yammering on about some vague notion of sin and without trying to convince someone that they are bad.

So, it is unnecessary, because most people on some level know that they have failed. It is unnecessary because they just need to believe, to meet him. He will take care of the rest.

But it is also counterproductive for the people who think they are “good.” They cannot allow themselves to admit they are lacking and they will argue with you tooth and nail to avoid that admission. Why waste time going down that rabbit hole? There are far better ways to approach that person rather than getting bogged down on this one issue. If you could introduce them to the person of Jesus, they will see for themselves how far away from “good” they are.

So, what’s the harm in focusing on sin?

Lastly, but important to me, is the potential harm in such a sin centered gospel. I plan to write about this more, but I see a tendency in Evangelical Christianity to subvert the focus of the  gospel into the idea that the ultimate goal is for you to be a good person. When we preach a sin centered gospel, that the problem is sin, it is only a baby step to the assumption that what God really wants is for you to behave better. Behavior is not the goal; it is the evidence. The goal is relationship.

“But,” you say, “Sin separates us from God.” Actually, no it doesn’t. Go back to John 3:17: a lack of belief separates you from God. Sin as a separation, has been removed. That is the actual gospel (1 Peter 2:24 and a million other verses). No one who knows the real gospel should ever even hint that a person should change their behavior as a prerequisite to a relationship with God. Anyone who understands would laugh at the concept: the idea of changing yourself. There is no better example of putting the cart before the horse.

Anyone who suggests otherwise is a danger to all. Nothing does more to separate man from God more than the idea that you must “get right” first. Remember what Isaiah said, “We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment” (64:6). Your own deeds is stink and it’s only his sacrifice that opens the door for you. So, please, do not even hint that someone’s behavior is the key to opening that door.

You don’t change your behavior, he does

Just as with the woman at the well, any change in behavior is a response to the relationship. Drink his water and then you will never thirst again. That’s why Jesus is called “the author and finisher of our faith.” He begins the relationship, and he carries it through to completion (Hebrews 12:2). Any change in your behavior for the better happens through him (Philippians 2:13).

Again, the point is that it is not about behavior. It is about relationship. Why did he sacrifice himself? To make it possible to have a relationship with you, not so that we could all behave better. So, does it matter how you behave? Only in that anyone in a real relationship with him will find themselves behaving better. If that’s not you, don’t try harder. Get more living water.

“Since I Gave Up Hope I Feel a Lot Better”

“Since I Gave Up Hope I Feel a Lot Better”

I heard a comedian say this years ago. I swear it was Emo Phillips, but I can’t confirm it.

In a strange way it makes sense. You hope for so many things, material things; you hope for so many things to happen, outcomes. You live your life divided, with one foot in the future, stealing from you the Now. So, you live without satisfaction, robbed of the present by something that may or may not happen. In the worst case scenario, when it doesn’t happen you are doubly devastated. First, you lose in not getting what you hoped for. Second, you lose in that you wasted time and energy spent in a false hope.

When you give up this hope, life becomes so much easier. No more longing for something that may not happen. No more devastation when it doesn’t. You are free. Anything good that happens; any good thing you receive, is a bonus.

False Hope

Am I saying should you give up all hope? No.

Didn’t get that promotion, that relationship, that object you desire? Without hope, there is no disappointment. Life goes on. There is no picking yourself up off the floor when that thing doesn’t happen. But there is much joy and thankfulness at the unexpected blessing when it does.

Go back and insert the word false before the word hope. The problem is not hope, but the wrong definition of hope. What is hope? It is NOT crossing your fingers. Hope IS an expectation, but hope is NOT an expectation without foundation. If you hope for anything without a promise that it is going to occur, you are engaging in false hope. Likewise, if the promise does not come from someone who can guarantee it, that is a false hope.

Do Not Let Hope Be Tied to Outcomes

What I’m suggesting is that you let go of outcomes. You do not know how things are going to turn out, and usually there is no promise of a certain result. Let what happens happen. I’ve heard many stories of people who have left a church, or the church, because of something that happened. A pastor had an affair, or another member did something hurtful, and the person lost faith. This comes from a false hope of what churches are supposed to be like. It comes from an assumed promise of a certain outcome.

Likewise, who hasn’t heard a story about someone who is mad at God, or has lost faith because they thought God promised them something, and it didn’t happen. Rather than focus on the theological problem here, I want to point out the problem in that false hope. What so often happens is that God says, “Go here,” or “Do this,” and the person hears, “If you go here, or do this, this great thing will happen.” When the great thing doesn’t happen, the person feels that they have been lied to. But He never said anything about what the outcome would be. He just said, “Trust me. Go.”

Divorce yourself of this tendency to be tied to the outcome. Let go of that “hope.” If I could change one thing about those around me it would be to stop trying to force things to go the way you “know” they should go. You don’t know, and even if you did, it’s not your job to make it happen. Do what is in front of you to do and leave it in his hands.

Do you have another choice? Admit that you have no control over the end result. Once you let go of that vague hope that the world around us sells as a valid endeavor, you will feel better. All of the pressure, all of the striving, all of the uncertainty will fade away. You can rest.

This is peace.

Another Kind of Hope

The apostle Paul says, “...suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.…” (Romans 5:3-5). This is clearly not some vague baseless hope that things will turn out the way you want. Our world’s idea of hope is certainly not produced by the ability to suffer in such a way as to build character. This is a different kind of hope that has a solid foundation based in experience, and more importantly, based on a promise from someone who can deliver.

I give you this definition of hope: Hope is the expectation of something that you know will happen. You know it because it is promised by someone who can and will deliver. The best analogy I can think of is the sun coming up, or my paycheck showing up in my checking account. I have through years of experience come to believe that the sun will come up. The same with my paycheck. It’s there every fourth Friday.

Now you might say that is not “hope.” But in the biblical definition of hope, the only thing that makes it hope is that you don’t have it yet. Just like tonight, I don’t have the sun, but I “hope” (expect) that it will come up tomorrow.

Why does this matter? The obvious answer is that I don’t spend all night worrying whether the sun will come up tomorrow. I can sleep tonight. But the more important answer is that it affects how I live today. I live with the expectation that there will be a sun tomorrow. I live as though I will get paid on Friday. I don’t hoard my money until the next check arrives. I spend what I need to.

These seem like obvious banal analogies, but it is even more important spiritually. You need to let go. Don’t worry about tomorrow (outcomes). The promise is “all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose…” (Romans 8:28). Just like trusting that the sun will come up, or any one of the million things we expect to happen, live accordingly, and do something more fruitful with your time. If you really believe that no matter what happens, it will all eventually turn out for good, it changes the way you live your life.

If you really believe what you believe. If you really trust in the One who can be trusted, you will live differently. Let go of all of the hope in outcomes that are unknown..

And you will feel a lot better.